Happy Fourth of July...

...You Jingoistic Bastards

Today is the Fourth of July and I thought it best – since your wellness is my only concern – to suggest taking it easy, taking it in stride, understanding that not everyone “gets it” like you do.

There will be many American flags on display today, many Sousa marches, many playings of Lee Greenberg songs, many people expressing their pride in the first and greatest “democracy” on the planet.

Do not let these acts of socio-cultural aggression get you down.

But still be extra careful when confronting your triggers – if you can, try not to notice the flags of the oppressor, try not to hear the words and songs of the rapacious colonialists, do not discuss the constitution, and try to avoid public displays of affluence affliction like cook outs and fireworks shows.

Hunker down at home, put your mask on to avoid any floating particulates (oh – and covid’s still out there,) and medicate, medicate, medicate.

This day shall pass.

That being said, a friend of mine from Louisiana was in DC for a summer pre-law semester at George Washington University when the Fourth rolled around.  When he went to the parade, he started getting out into the street, yelling at the floats, and jumping up and down.

His friends reeled him back in and asked him what he was doing – he said he was trying to get the beads and beers and trinkets that were going to be thrown into the crowd.  Never having been at a parade outside of Louisiana, he assumed that every parade everywhere was like a Mardi Gras parade.

After his friends explained to him that you supposed to stand and watch, he was shocked, asking why anyone would ever go to any parade if there weren’t any “throws.”

Needless to say, he was deeply disappointed by the Yankee version of the holiday.

As to fireworks, they are of course wonderful – just give the dog a half teaspoon of Benadryl and he’ll be fine (actually, that’s legit advice and safe, but do judge dosage based on weight.)

But as to fireworks scenes, few top this:

Happy Fourth!!!

And never forget:  we played golf on the moon.  We win.